Getting a changed perspective on life (2 Sam 14:1-20)

A former Christian colleague in banking had a highly paid job in Hungary, but she became increasingly uncomfortable about the pressure put on employees to squeeze as much profit out of clients as possible. Yet, every time she reflected on this, she felt stuck. If she gave up her job, where would she be? The money was good, and she struggled to let go of it. Around this time, she saw the third part of the Hobbit trilogy and was struck by the dilemma that Thorin Oakenshield, the dwarf king, faces in the movie when he cannot let go of his treasure. In a moment of near insanity with voices clamouring in his head, he walks the golden floor of his palace and sees himself sinking and being swallowed up by his gold, which finally awakens him from his deadly greed. Walking out of the cinema, my friend was shaken by the thought that her own reluctance to let go of her job and salary was rooted in similar greed. Sometimes, another person’s life or story intersects with ours in such a way that we recognise it as, in some measure, our own.

The Tekoan woman’s story

The story told David in our reading is meant to do something similar and prompt reflection about the dilemma the king is facing. Absalom fled to his maternal grandfather, the king of Geshur (east of the Sea of Galilee; 2 Sam 3:3) and while David longed for him (2 Sam 13:39), he did nothing. Since Absalom was next in line for the throne, this created an intolerable situation.[1] Joab understood David’s heart (2 Sam 14:1) and orchestrated a situation where the king had to confront his inclinations. The wise woman’s story has just enough similarity to David and his sons to prompt reflection without giving the ruse away. In both, one son kills the other, though Absalom’s act is premeditated, and the fictitious son’s is not necessarily (2 Sam 14:6). In both, there is the threat of death. If the woman’s guilty son is executed, the family dies out with him (2 Sam 14:7); if Absalom remains banished, ‘we will surely die’ (2 Sam 14:14). What the woman means here is unclear, though she perhaps has in mind issues of succession that can lead to civil war and deaths.

David’s reaction

 We see once again David’s curious reluctance to act with decision as he initially fobs off the woman with a vague promise to deal with her problem (2 Sam 14:8). However, she perseveres, assuring the king that any guilt for the royal leniency must fall on her (2 Sam 14:9). Responding to her persistence and swearing an oath to protect her son (2 Sam 14:11), he unwittingly condemns himself for not giving clemency to his own son (2 Sam 14:13-14). The explanation of the issue in these verses is illuminating, even though Joab and the woman are not expressly coming as God’s messengers (unlike Nathan), so we must ponder if their view is right. Nevertheless, it gives us (and David) another perspective on the matter (2 Sam 14:20). The unresolved tension with Absalom affects all God’s people (v.13) and such strife and possible deaths from it is like the irreversible spilling of water (v.14 cf. Prov 17:14). Moreover, David is reminded that God wants to preserve life, not take it (v.14), and indeed, he himself has benefited from such grace after Uriah’s murder.

A challenging perspective

David’s story challenges us as it presents us with the tensions of justice and mercy and does so through someone who is no impartial spectator but himself sinful and implicated in the sins of his sons. It is good to remember that in most of our quarrels and tensions not all the fault is on one side and sorting out our tangled responsibilities is made harder by our lack of impartiality. Aiming to be fair but also generous and merciful to others takes humility. In the end, we look to the Lord, who faced the same dilemma with His wayward, idolatrous son, Israel (Hos 11:1-4). Justice (as described in God’s law) required such a rebellious son to be given up to death (Deut 21:18-21), yet the Lord says of Israel, ‘How can I give you up?’ (Hos 11:8-9). His mercy triumphs over judgment.

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[1] 2 Samuel 3:3 lists another son, Chileab, who was between Amnon and Absalom, but he is never mentioned again, so the likelihood is that he died young before the events related here.

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