What to do when our commitment is found wanting? (1 Sam 14:16-23)

A well-known pastor faced opposition in his church. The week when the confrontation came to a head, he asked God for the message he should preach, as was his practice. But he heard nothing. Friday rolled around, then Saturday and still silence from God except a sense that ‘it will be given you in that hour what you are to say’ (Matt 10:19). As Sunday morning dawned, the pastor arrived at the church early – still nothing from God. He pulled out a piece of paper in his office and started jotting down some points to use in the sermon, but then he thought, ‘I have trusted God so far, I cannot start relying on myself now.’ So, he screwed up the notes and threw them in the waste basket as he was heading out the door. When he stood up to preach that morning, the Lord indeed gave him the words to speak.[1]

From time to time, we find ourselves in situations when our commitment to God is tested. It is often in those moments that we can see for ourselves how deep (or shallow) our loyalty to the Lord is. Saul’s situation in its essentials is almost a repeat of the earlier incident when Samuel was late (1 Sam 13:8-14). Once again, it is Jonathan who initiates and once again, there is time pressure to act. Saul’s perspective is revealing when he sees the commotion in the enemy camp. He does not ask if this is God but assumes a human agent and instantly takes stock to see who is missing from the camp (1 Sam 14:17). Although he turns out to be right that one of his own was responsible, his focus is on the human plane first. When he inquires of God, the shifting conditions push him to abandon the attempt to seek the Lord (1 Sam 14:19). It is almost as if Saul knew what the right thing was and did it mechanically, but when the tension mounted, he could not stay the course. He ended up bending with the circumstances.

Before we condemn Saul out of hand, it is important that we examine our own hearts and recognise our weaknesses. There are times when God is convicting us about something, but we are not yet entirely convinced. It is that half-heartedness, that lack of full conviction that creates this kind of ambiguous behaviour that we see in Saul. As Elijah put it so graphically, ‘How long will you limp between two opinions? If the Lord is God, follow Him; but if Baal, follow him.’ (1 Kings 18:21). It is so tempting to limp in two directions wanting to hold on to our relationship with God, while also not letting go of practices and things that offer fulfilment but only enslave us.

As we struggle with sin, we may cry out with Paul, ‘Wretched man that I am! Who will set me free from the body of this death?’ (Rom 7:24). What can we do when circumstances lay bare our lacking commitment? Our passage teaches us that God repeatedly puts us into a place where our heart is revealed. Just as Saul had more than one opportunity to recognise his condition, so the Lord wants to teach us, not condemn us out of hand. Sadly, in Saul’s case there was no recognition of any wrongdoing; he seemed as oblivious now as he was when first confronted by Samuel (1 Sam 13:11-12). Thus, an acknowledgement of our lukewarmness is the start. We have to agree with the Lord’s diagnosis of us before change can happen. If we struggle to see things God’s way, we can pray that He may open our eyes and convict us. He is also our only help in turning things around and responding to Him with trust and obedience. As a student of mine once testified, when he saw his own half-heartedness, he asked God’s help and He renewed his love for Him. He is our only hope through whom change is possible (Rom 7:25).

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[1] I use this example with some reluctance because it is an exceptional case and I do not want to create the impression that preparation and work in God’s service is not necessary. There is a humorous anecdote that illustrates this point about a young pastor who did not prepare a sermon for Sunday because he expected the Holy Spirit to speak to him ‘in that hour’. The Holy Spirit duly showed up and told him, ‘you did not prepare’.

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